Skip to main content

black and white bible, black and blue wife







Black and white bible, black and blue wife: My story of finding hope after domestic abuse by Ruth A. Tucker

Nobody deserves to get beat senseless by a man, much less a man who is cut from the preacher’s cloth, but this is part of Ruth A. Tucker’s story, in her new book, black and white bible, black and blue wife. She describes her experience in the introduction in this way, “During his violent rages, my ex-husband often hurled biblical texts at me, as though the principal tenet of Scripture was, “Wives, submit to you husbands…I felt trapped and feared for my life, while outwardly disguising bruises with long sleeves and clever excuses, pretending that ours was a happy marriage (14).” 

The frightening place that Ruth found herself in, in a marriage that was brimming with violence was difficult to move on from.  For one, she had to found a safe place for her son Carlton, who had seen these violent rages in living color in their home.  Yet, one of the despicable things that Ruth references in the opening chapter is one question, “Can we come together as a Christian community and recognize that the doctrine of male headship has sometimes been used as a cover to perpetrate violence against women?  At the same time, can we come together in an understanding that marriage based on mutual submission is a biblical model – a valid interpretation of Scripture? (23).”  The point of noting the abuse of male headship as a foil for violence and the importance of mutual submission are two key areas we must discuss.  The point that Ruth makes in the book that needs to be on center focus is, “And that a husband was to “love his wife as Christ loved the church” was certainly a standard far beyond what was expected of husbands in the ancient world (46).” 

Ruth’s concept of mutual consent has many merits to it in terms for both husbands and wives.  Building her case by looking at Proverbs 31, Ruth writes, “Would the Proverbs 31 woman have been prepared to manage the household without her husband?  Of course she would have.  Is a woman who is ruled by her husband prepared?  When a husband makes the decisions, a wife is left in a vulnerable position upon his death (50).”  There is sense of demeaning the intelligence of a woman if we fail to guide her through the affairs of life in marriage including money, taxes, household things as well.

With later discussions of rape (legitimate and marital), John Calvin and feminism, and violence and what is the way forward, Ruth does not shy away from these often painful issues.  I hope that those going through these situations will find comfort from her words.


Thanks to BookLookBloggers for the copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Black Earth: The Holocaust as History and Warning

Black Earth: The Holocaust as History and Warning by Timothy Snyder
Misperceptions, misconnections, and missed observations are just some of the issues that Timothy Snyder raises in his book, Black Earth, concerning the Holocaust.  Snyder, no stranger to the frontlines of scholarship on the Holocaust, with his previous book Bloodlands, that concerns the land from Hitler to Stalin, takes a look at the Holocaust from new sources and new avenues of thought.  How did some nation-states survive relatively unscathed from Nazi persecution while others, notably Jewish populations, succumb to a wave of killings?  Also, what was the role of the Soviet Union in the war and how did Stalin effect changes in the Final Solution?  These questions are only two of the many that Snyder answers in his detailed account of the Holocaust.
One of the best chapters was entitled The Auschwitz Paradox.  Generally when the public thinks about the Holocaust, we think of Auschwitz first or at the top of our mental m…

the great spiritual migration

The Great Spiritual Migration by Brian D McLaren

Brian McLaren and his own pithy way brings to the foreground and emphasis on a new kind of Christianity. The kind of faith that Brian envisions is a kind of migration not been set in the bedrock of beliefs that is unmoving but rather shifting with both culture and with faith. His new book the great spiritual migration is exactly that, a pointed work that encapsulates a vision towards the future where Christianity is changing and its peoples lives are changed as well.

Brian states in the introduction, "but we also know that for a lot of people Christianity is malfunctioning, seriously so, and it's not pretty. This kind of frustration with conventional Christianity is what McLaren gets gets to at the heart of this message is concerned with a number of different clusters unbelief. One, namely that Christianity has been stuck in a set of propositions or beliefs that has controlled churches in the faith, rather then a spirit of love t…

The Paraclete Poetry Anthology, Edited by Mark S. Burrows

Bringing words to life on a page is hard work, and no work is harder than poetry.  Poets take the visceral, the mundane, and the disjointed and frayed things of life and put them on their head.  This new anthology of poetry put out by Paraclete Press and edited by Mark S. Burrows, takes the best poetry of today and brings together old and new poems from these gifted creators.  You find poems from Scott Cairs, SAID, Phyllis Tickle, and others.  The collection stems the span of 2005-2016 and includes both religious poems and themes, as well as themes covering a broad swath of topics.

One of the beauties of this collection is the array of poems that the anthology includes in its pages.  One poem in particular stuck with me as read through the collection.  Anna Kamienska is a wonderful Polish poet who interacts with the wider lens of faith while looking carefully at the world we live in.  She says in her poem named Gratitude, (44)

A tempest threw a rainbow in my face
so that I wanted to…